If you are someone with a lonely life
Answer my ad ‘expert needs wife’
And you can listen to me all the day long
But don’t try to speak cuz you’ll only be wrong
To achieve this level of expertise took me many years
So don’t think for one minute that your beguiling or your tears
Are going to put a dent in this perfect temperament
I understand that it must feel lonely to be
As misguided as you probably are with no one to see
So come answer my ad and you can bask in the light
Of you own special one who always happens to be right
Expert needs wife
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