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Howdy Neighbor

by Richard Haxton

I’m out on my front porch
I got me a tale to tell
I don’t wear no sheet or burn no torch
Come over and set a spell

I’ll talk you a bunch of words
You tell me if you heard ’em
I can see what you think of me
A reductio ad absurdum

I don’t use no spittoon
Ceci n’est pas un corncob pipe
Let’s set and see who turns out to be
The bona fide stereotype

I don’t wanna own no one
Don’t wanna be no one’s massa
I’ll take you from Jethro Clampett and Daisy Duke
To the red neck tabula rasa

Howdy neighbor

You say you can read my ways
By my accent and my clothing
You imply that every word I say
Is a case of my own self-loathing

Let me rustle us up some grits
Put on my overall jeans
Lemme take you down to Mississippi
It’s the capital of New Orleans

I’ll be Joe Christmas meets The Misfit
Miss Dubois meets Miss Eudora
Cousin Lyman meets Bigger Thomas
The redneck Jew explora
Prevail meets endura

Irony is the cruelest month
Whan that Aprill, with his shoures soote
Makes the heart grow to see what used to be
Another ignat moota foota

Howdy neighbor